You have got to be kidding!!!

I really like Paul.  I mean I really like Paul and his writing...and in this case his sense of humour. Reading through the text for this Sunday from Ephesians 4:25-5:2 I think we see Paul at his best. Let me just highlight some of the funnier bits.

No more lying...yeah, sure. Like that is gonna happen. Is there anyone out there who would appreciate me telling the truth all the time and in all situations??? Could I even live with myself if I told the truth about myself to myself? (yeah...take a moment and go back to reread that one carefully)

Do not let your anger lead you into sin...well, Paul didn't have to put up with peak hour traffic and those idiot drivers. He never got his parking spot snaked from under him at the mall. He didn't have to live with some of the people I have to live and work with every day.  Sometimes anger is all I have left!

Stop robbing...OK...I'll stop the breaking and entering, and the car theft, and the hand bag snatching, and the shoplifting, and the pirating DVDs, and the illegal music downloads, and the cheating on the parking meters, and the small lies on the returned goods, and whatever I can get away with on my income tax, and all that extra food I waste and throw away, and my lifestyle that uses up way more of the world resources than is needed, and maybe we should walk away from this one now.

Do not use harmful words...I don't do this. I am just telling the truth.  Isn't that what I am supposed to do? And what is wrong with a bit of sarcasm or honest criticism anyway? Some people...you just can't please them...so Paul, make up your mind.

I won't even go into the one about making the Holy Spirit sad or getting rid of bitterness, passion and anger which are some of my favourite things...you know...like whiskers on kittens and brown paper packages tied up with string.

But one last thought. 

Your life must be controlled by love (Ephesians 5:2)  This had better be God's love because I don't have enough self-love to sustain a love for my neighbour, let alone control my life. Which reminds me, didn't Jesus say something about my not being able to control anything????